‘Do you have the patience to wait
till your mud settles and the water is clear?"
Do you ever find yourself wondering how some people are able to be so decisive and confident in their choices and answers? Mindfulness is the answer. Don't worry this isn't the mindfulness that requires a weekend course or hundreds of dollars in professional coaching. This is the basic mindfulness that many people used before mindfulness was a trending word.
The past few weeks I have been writing about how doing the self-love work is essential to helping us live out our dreams. This series was originally supposed to be a 6-week series, but I have had to take a few weeks off because doing self-love work can actually hurt in the beginning. I didn’t realize that this journey would allow me to uncover and release so much emotional junk I was unconsciously holding on to. I realized that I have not been patient or even open to the idea of waiting for my mud to settle like the quote asks. The whole idea of the mud settling and the water turning clear had not even occurred to me. I was feverishly trying to swim away from the mud, thus never giving it a chance to settle. Why am I sharing this? These revelations helped me to understand that I haven’t truly been living the life that I wanted but letting life happen to me, I wasn't being mindful in my decision making. I was mostly reacting to situations instead of responding.
When we are constantly reacting to life we are hovering around survival mode and eventually it starts to take a toll on us, we experience burnout, indecisiveness, depression, anxiety, and much more. Responding to life, is when we learn to pause and take in the whole of a situation before making a decision. We are able to not make every situation personal and see it for what it really is, therefore making a clear decision. Responding to life helps us to be confident in our choices, it allows us to be more stable, it allows us to not only show more compassion to others but also to ourselves and so much more.
Now as a parent and entrepreneur, I am realizing that my old habits are no longer working for me because I have been in a constant state of exhaustion and second guessing myself. These old habits have been the root of my reactions. So now as I rewire my mind to take more pauses and respond to things, there is some initial resistance in the form of inconsistency. my goal is 1% daily improvement and I invite you to try the same.
Learning to respond more in your life will not only have an impact on your self esteem, self care habits, and consistency but it will also make a world of difference in how you interact to everyone around you.
Three action steps to start now:
Take breathing breaks throughout the day ( Taking a few deep breaths can help ground us, relieve stress and help us think clearly.)
Have a gratitude journal. ( This will be helpful in giving your mind permission to not take everything personal in a negative sense.)
Do a time log ( This will give you a clear picture of where you are giving your energy and time. Once you are more of aware of this it will help you figure out where in your life you need to practice more responding. )